Wednesday, March 6, 2024

The Mania Main Event Picture

Today's scheduled video has been pushed back to tomorrow due to some last-minute changes and edits. Because I don't want to leave you totally hanging, I've decided to publish my gathering of thoughts regarding the Wrestlemania main event angle; something that I was going to touch on this weekend with the next DTM-CAST episode, but quite frankly, I wanna talk about other stuff and not make that episode drag longer than necessary.

So here are some quick thoughts I had regarding the whole Cody/Roman/Rock deal and hopefully, we'll have a proper video tomorrow.

So there was this Cody fellow, yes?

Came back to WWE a couple years ago, began a story about chasing the title that his dad never won, the title his father held in his hands but never won... 'cuz y'see, Cody had a famous father... a father who's dead... and once upon a time, his famous father had wrestled the reigning WWE champion and beat him. Even got to hold the belt and everything... but because he neither pinned nor submitted the champion, Cody's famous father didn't technically win the title. And so here comes his son, after having left WWE years earlier to make his mark, now back to win the title that has eluded his father. And since returning to WWE, Cody had a story to his character. He had a purpose.

Fast forward to Wrestlemania 39 and Cody Rhodes is challenging for the WWE Champion, facing off against the defending champion, Roman Reigns. A year's build up to this moment and Cody... doesn't win. He fails to finish the story. People are upset and HHH tries to put out the flames. "There's more to this story," he says, "We should be patient. There's a long game being played here." That's what he told us, at least. Most people weren't convinced that this was a "long game" being played, but rather a last-minute decision made by the old boss.

And so Cody chugs along for another year - suffering only a loss to Brock Lesnar, but otherwise kept relatively strong. Eventually he wins the Royal Rumble match for the second year in a row. First man to do that since Steve Austin and he immediately challenges Roman Reigns, the man he failed to usurp for the title. Finally... the long wait was going to be over and Cody gets to finish the story that should have been finished a year earlier.

Then one day on Smackdown, Cody decides, "Yeah, I ain't challenging you at Mania. I'm gonna let DWAYNE do it."

Oh yeah, I forgot about Dwayne... who showed up on RAW one day and teased an encounter with Roman down the road. At the time, people were receptive to the idea. And so he decides to buy himself a seat at the Board Of Directors, he gets all his trademarks and stuff under his ownership as well as some stock, and... oh yeah, a guaranteed main event slot with Roman Reigns at Wrestlemania XL, slated to be the biggest Mania of all time.

So we do the thing where Cody steps aside and Dwayne comes in to face off against Roman, teasing the match that he figured the people wanted... and then something strange happened that nobody - well, nobody within the WWE or TKO circle, at least - saw coming. People were pissed. People wanted Cody to finish his story. They had to wait a year for Cody to finish his story and now that might have to wait another year for Cody to finish his story... assuming he gets to finish it at all.

A week later, Cody changes his mind and declares, "Yeah, you know, Roman Reigns, I choose you." with all the enthusiasm of a Pokemon trainer. And naturally, that made DWAYNE mad because he wanted that main event with Roman Reigns... just like he wanted Black Adam to go toe to toe with Superman. He didn't want nothing to do with Shazam! Shazam can go wank off with all the other crybabies. No, this was Black Adam and Superman. It'd be the biggest thing ever and DC said no... so Black Adam buys himself a set on the board of directors and says I'm gonna challenge Dollar-Store Aquaman for the title. And they say yes. And people say no because they want Cody to finish his story... and now we got this thing where Cody gets the chance to finish his story, but now DWAYNE has joined the Bloodline and things are picking up steam because DWAYNE is good at his job. DWAYNE knows what the people want... and what the people want is THE ROCK.

 And when he showed up on Smackdown - he had the nice shirt, he had the glasses, he teared the crowd a new one, there were an energy and charm in his voice and demeanor that hadn't been seen in decades... let me tell you folks something. If they went through with Rock/Roman this year, you wouldn't be getting Rock/Roman. You'd be getting DWAYNE/Roman. And DWAYNE/Roman would've been lame as fuck.

That night on Smackdown, we didn't get DWAYNE. We got THE ROCK. Back in full form. Not half-baked. Not half-assed. Not Cutesy-cute Dwayne with his silly nursery rhymes and singalongs. This was THE ROCK circa 1998-2000. He was back and he was pissed because people didn't want DWAYNE vs. ROMAN; they didn't want Black Adam getting his roody-poo candy ass whooped by Bargain Basement Aquaman. They wanted Cody to finish his story... this is all great stuff that they fluked out on, because DWAYNE isn't an old man with a single mindset. DWAYNE is a smart man... not always, but he can be. He knew what people wanted and he decided to step aside, so that Cody can finish his story... maybe.

Anyway, I'm rambling on about all this but the point I'm trying to make is... DWAYNE should have been around last year to tell people. "NO, Cody is going to finish his story at Wrestlemania 39. People are going to be happy. People are going to go banana. And then Wrestlemania 40, the Rock says we give them Black Adam getting his candy-ass whooped by AliExpress Aquaman."

Someone asked a question about how people were clamoring for a Rock/Roman match years ago and that now that they were on the verge of getting it, why would they reject it in favor of this other guy, Cody, finishing his story or whatever. And my answer to that is, "Go ask someone who wanted Rock vs. Roman" because I never did. I never wanted that match. And I like Rock. Always liked the Rock back in the day. And when he came back for that first match with Cena, I was all for it. Once in a lifetime and all that... but then turns out it's Twice In A Lifetime because Cena has to get his win back... not only that, but we gotta make it a title match and that mean Punk, who was having a hell of a run as WWE Champion, saw his year-plus long reign killed in favor of a part-time Hollywood actor who was coming in for the sake of giving the rub to somebody who doesn't really need it... and that's the same deal with Roman.

Rock vs. Roman, yeah, it'll make some money... but after that, then what? Rock loses to Roman and he fucks off back to another failed Hollywood movie while Roman does the same little he does every day. People say they want that match and I'm like, "Really? Why? That match would've been the drizzling shits even by Rock standards." Like, whatever. Who gives a shit?

Still, a few years ago, if you wanted to run that match when nothing else was going on - and believe me, there was a long stretch when they had NOTHING going on because pandemics, trying to make Roman look really, REALLY strong, that sort of thing - then yeah, sure, whatever, who cares, go for it. Again, it'd be the shits, but you'd have your match. But now that you've got this other thing, this hot thing that you've got going with Cody Rhodes - and yes, not everyone is going to be on board the Codyverse train or whatever... they're probably salty over Wrestlemania not being headlined by Black Adam getting his candy-ass whooped by Dollar Store Aquaman - but the fact is people were invested in this character that they've been building up over a year after dropping the ball on him at the previous show.

And this looked to be the year that we finish this goddamn story and now you want us to forget all of that because Dwayne buys himself a seat on the board of directors and demands a match with Roman Reigns at Wrestlemania 40... so now, instead of Cody getting to finish the story that I STILL believe should have been finished last year... because had you finished the story last year, THEN you could have had your ballyhooed Black Adam getting his roody-poo candy-ass whooped by Dollar Store Aquaman as your Wrestlemania 40 main event and Cody could defend the title against Punk or whoever.

Now I heard the news and I made a week of salty posts afterwards... and I promise you I wasn't as upset about this as those posts let on. And then of course, Sacha passes and I pretty much laid low for a couple week before I'd get up to speed on everything, but yeah, for those who missed it, it is indeed Cody Rhodes challenging for the Undisputed WWE Championship against the defending champion Roman Reigns, the Rock has fully embraced his heeldom and joined the Bloodline, though some suspect that this alliance might not be on the level. And all credit to Dwayne; he could have pushed forward, but he knew people wanted Cody, so they went back to Cody vs. Roman for Night 2 and Rock is getting a tag-match. We're getting the best promos out of Rock in ages. Guy's a good babyface, but he was always the better heel and that guy got to let loose. So yeah, let's have this Cody guy finish his story and maybe next year, you can have your Black Adam getting his roody-poo candy-ass whooped by Dollar Store Aquaman...

But you know... there was a simple thing that could have been done to avoid all of this mess in the first place... and that was to have Cody finish the story at Wrestlemania 39. Don't play the long game; I've seen WWE try to do the long game. They're not very good at it, especially when their attention span - regardless of management - is often flaky. But if Cody had finished his story last year at Mania, then you'd be free to do whatever you want at this year's Mania and if that meant your big main event was Black Adam getting his candy-ass whooped by Aquaman, you could do that and everyone would be happy because Cody got to finish his story and now he gets to job the belt to Punk (assuming he didn't tear a tricep or something)... I don't know. I'm just saying.

So yeah, listen... what they've got going now is actually a lot more interesting than whatever they had planned with Cody/Roman II originally, certainly way the fuck better than anything they would've pulled out of their asses for Rock/Roman because yeah, no way would we have gotten a Rock this good, this motivated, this driven had it been the other one. This blows away anything he did with Cena, blows away his little cameos that he'd do here and there... hell, I'll even go so far to say this is even BETTER than Hollywood Rock circa 2003 - and you think you nimrods were going to get this ROCK had it been him and Roman? Get the fuck out here.

But... yeah, the road to Mania is getting interesting. It's going to be a fun ride, but only with the right payoff is this whole thing going to be worthwhile because otherwise... kindly fuck off. I ain't waiting another year. I'll just watch TNA for the rest of the fucking year and be content with that... I mean, sure, why not? Show's actually fucking good these days... I'd be down with that.

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