WCW Bash At The Beach 1996

"Whose side is he on?" The immortals words of one Bobby "The Brain" Heenan were uttered (and consequently scrubbed from subsequent WWE Network airings of this event as I recall) should have cast doubt as to whether the man coming down the ring would be the man who would fend off these callous Outsiders from up there or be the much-vaunted third man that had been teased weeks prior. That faint warning was quickly dismissed because there's no way it could be.

But for those truly in the know, who else could it have been?

Before we get to that pivotal moment in wrestling history, we have the Bash At The Beach undercard, which is about as business as usual as you can get given a night that nobody figured would have big ramifications for the business going forward. Let's get that out of the way so that we can get to the good stuff.

Rey Mysterio Jr. defeated Psychosis in a super-fun and fast-paced lucha match that really got the crowd going. As far as opening matches go, this was way up there in getting people excited for the rest of the show... and then they follow it up with Big Bubba and Big John Tenta in a Sock On A Pole match, with said sock containing a bunch of silver dollars. This match was not as fast-paced... nor was it as fun... and ended with Tenta grabbing the sock and whacking Bubba with it for the pin. Yippee.

Speaking of Yippie... Diamond Dallas Page beat Hacksaw Jim Duggan in a taped fist match, where both guys have their fists taped up and they just hit each other. Down and dirty brawling in more ways than one, but I wouldn't call this completely useless. Sometimes, I'd be down with a down and dirty brawl.

The Nasty Boys defeated The Public Enemy (of ECW fame) with a betrayal from the PE table, which refused to break on multipe occasions when PE tried to put one of the Nasties through. What is this, a Divas match? Break, you fucking useless piece of wood... oh wait, Sags went through the table after the match. Never mind. I wish that table the best of luck in all its future endeavors at the woodchipper where it belongs. The non-breaking super table aside, this was a thing that happened.

Cruiserweight Champion Dean Malenko defeated the Disco Inferno to retain the title in a perfectly acceptable wrestling match. Some people consider Disco to be out there with some of his viewpoints on the business, but the guy was an entertaining dude back in the day and Dean was no slouch, either. I enjoyed this one.

Steve "Mongo" McMichael beat Joe Gomez with a Tombstone Piledriver. Dragged for far too long and made me wonder why they never booked a Taker vs. Mongo match. It's not like Mongo is a stranger to WWF fans; he was at Wrestlemania XI for fuck's sake!

Ric Flair defeated WCW United States champion KONNAN to win the title in an entertaiing enough little matc.

The Giant & Kevin Sullivan defeated Chris Benoit & Arn Anderson... which leads to a feud between Sullivan and Benoit over Woman and... yeah, I don't want to go farther than that. The match was a thing that happened and that's as far as I'll go.

And then we had the match...

The Outsiders - Hall and Nash - come out alone and with no third man as promised. Out comes Mean Gene to inquire about where this dude is, to which they reply that they can more than handle these clowns... said clowns being Sting, Lex Luger, and the Macho Man Randy Savage, all wearing the same Sting-style facepaint... and these clowns get their asses kicked by these Outsiders, with Luger getting rammed into the post and get knocked out cold, prompting medical people to come out and carry him out on a stretcher.

Now these Outsiders are bad dudes. So bad that the WCW announcers are pleading for another guy to join the WCW team and kill these former WWF'ers. Take notes, kids. THIS is how you introduce a new top villain and make them a genuine threat. And then an errant trading of the low blows causes Savage and Nash to double over on the ground... and that's when Hulk Hogan begins his long walk towards the ring.

"Whose side is he on?" The immortals words of one Bobby "The Brain" Heenan were uttered (and consequently scrubbed from subsequent WWE Network airings of this event as I recall) should have cast doubt as to whether the man behind Hulkamania would be the man who would fend off these callous Outsiders from up there or be the much-vaunted third man that had been teased weeks prior. That faint warning was quickly dismissed because there's no way it could be. It would go against Hogan's very being to side with these insidious assholes.

But for those truly in the know, who else could it have been?

When it comes to WWF castoffs, who was the biggest one of them? Who was the one who represented the face of that promotion more than anyone in the world? When Hogan came to WCW in 1994 and he fought Ric Flair, people cheered... not because they got Hulk Hogan, but because they got Ric Flair vs. Hulk Hogan. Once Flair was out of the picture and Hogan was left to do his schtick against Brother Bruti and the Dungeon Of Doom, people turned on him. People wanted nothing to do with this red and yellow gimmick that Hogan was peddling. While Hogan was doing his usual good guy schtick, people were jeering him. You take that into consideration; could it really have been anybody else?

It's been said that Hogan was hesitant about the turn and honestly, I couldn't blame him for wanting to take a chance on something different and risk losing potential monies to be made off being wrestling's #1 good guy. But Hulk Hogan in WCW was not the Hulk Hogan of WWF's prime years. This was the ultimate outside to this promotion that was raised on old-school professional wrestling. Hogan was the sports entertainer in a pro wrestling promotion and was sounded hated on that merit among others. Even without the benefit of hindsight, there was only one man who could have been that third man. Slip anyone else in that role and it simply wouldn't have worked.

And so Hogan drops the leg on Savage, to the shock and awe of everyone watching. After "pinning" Savage with Hall counting the pin, the Outsiders and their new buddy celebrate the whoo being pulled over everyone's eyes as garbage starts to litter the ring and ringside area - something that Scott Hall didn't approve of. Mean Gene then comes out to get an answer from the formerly righteous Hulk Hogan, who cuts one of the most legendary and chilling promos of his career, turning his back on the fans that brought him to this point while sticking it to those who stuck it to him, and pretty much declaring war on the promotion that had been his home for a couple years.

And the show ends with the parting words of Tony Schiavone; "Hulk Hogan, you can go to hell. Straight to hell."

I've seen this match and the aftermath many, many times and it still holds up as a superb piece of storytelling and one of the finer examples of a wrestling angle having last rammifications. The seeds were planted on Nitro, the soil watered at the Great American Bash, and now the nWo plant was starting to grow into the monster that would propel WCW to ratings dominance and become the hottest thing in professional wrestling... until it overstayed its welcome, people got bored, and switched over to the WWF, but that's jumping ahead.

Bash At The Beach 1996 is known for the one angle and it's an angle that's been showcased many times over the decades. But the rest of the show isn't too bad, either. The opening match is a fun time, as are the title matches. All in all, a solid outing of wrestling.