Friday, May 14, 2021

AEW Dynamite (May 12, 2021): Stuff Happens, I Guess

Disclaimer: Shaq does not appear on this edition of AEW Dynamite. Shaq's face does match my own reaction after watching this episode.

Well, it's the week after le Blued And Goots show... and it's time for another episode of Dynamite; perhaps one of the more baffling episodes of Dynamite yet.

Kicking off in grand fashion with Jon Moxley coming out to the Troggs' Wild Thing, which is about as ill-fitting of a theme song as you can get for a guy like Mox, no matter how much of a classic tune it is. I suppose it's kinda cool that AEW is willing to fork over cash for popular songs and such, but not everyone needs a new tune and I honestly feel Mox's original theme fit him a hell of a lot better than Wild Thing.

Anyway, IWGP United States Champion Jon Moxley defeated New Japan legend Yuji Nagata to retain the title in a short but intensely physical match with both guys pounding the piss out of each other. For someone in his 50s, Nagata certainly held his own and Mox returned the favor in kind. After the match, both men bow in a sign of respect.

Meanwhile, the Inner Circle vow revenge for Jericho's fall and Santana being in jail due to sticking a fork in MJF's skull... well, far be it for me to side with ol' Max, but the fork was a little much and not needed in this modern world of... whatever.

Speaking of ill-fitting things unsuited and unneeded for this modern world, Cody Rhodes comes out and celebrates his American-ism by challenging non-American Anthony Ogogo to a match at Double or Nothing, where Cody will assume the mantle of the American Dream for one night only... "America, fuck yeah" and all that jazz. Cody usually does good promos - and to be fair, this was as fine a promo as any - but the old America vs Evil Foreigner chestnut being played here is kinda lame. Ogogo punches people and Cody wants to keep him from punching more people. That could've been fine... but I guess we need AMERICA FUCK YEAH. Not for me.

AEW Tag-Team Champions The Young Bucks defeated SCU to retain the titles and as a result of this lost, Daniels and Kazarian's run as a tag-team - dating back to the days of TNA or so - is over. Fine match hampered by the constant and blatant outside interference from te Good Jobbers. I get it - you're trying to get heat with the cheap win and the outside cheating, but ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. We don't need outside interference in every goddamn match.

So this tag-team has come to the realization that their run is over and rather than spend time on this emotional moment, it's TO THE BACK so we can see Mox and Eddie Kingston trash the Elite locker room. You know, when AEW decided to do that partnership with TNA, I was hoping one of the things that wouldn't jump ship would be the old Vince Russo-inspired playbook of TO THE BACK.

Christian Cage announces an open challenge and throws his hat into the Casino Battle Royale, then Matt Sydal answers the challenge and says he will also partake in the CBR. Christian quips about Sydal and falls, referencing last year's unfortunate spot.

The match between Orange Cassidy and PAC to determine Kenny Omega's next challenge ends in a double-countout when Orange got legit hurt and while a doctor was checking on him, Kenny Omega ran in and struck PAC in the back to give Dynamite its first non-finish. Apparently, the match was supposed to end in a time limit draw, but Orange got legit hurt and they had to change the finish. In any case, the end result remains the same. Kenny is forced to defend the AEW title in a three-way against PAC and Cassidy. I will allow this so long as they do it the same way ECW did theirs; elimination as opposed to first fall wins. I hate that first fall win because it seems like a cheap way of getting out of a certain outcome by doing a less than desirable outcome. As for the double KO? It was either that or a timeout and since they couldn't do the time out, might as well do it this way... just so long as they don't make a habit out of it.

Meanwhile, the Bucks are so distraught over their things being wrecked that they challenge Mox and Kingston to a match at Double Or Nothing... sure, why not? Should be fun.

Hangman Page also challenges Brian Cage to a Double Or Nothing match... presumably to get his win back.

The Pinnacle hold their celebrating, refuses the Circles challenge, and notes how Shawn Spears was responsible for Dynamite's best ratings on TSN... and then the Circle comes out to spray the Pinnacle with the bubbly, which prompts MJF to lay down the challenge; his group against Jericho's (and yes, Ol' Chris was there with a cast) and if the Circle loses, they disband. Dude, you already did a break up angle on the SAME SHOW and you treated it like a TNA show with your TO TEH BACK!!! Now you're ripping off old Steve Austin bits? I don't care if the statute of limitation on angle theft has passed; we didn't need another homage to the old days that I can easily watch on the Network or on Youtube. Also, if they are busting out the Stadium Stampede NOW, then what's to come afterwards? Because you've just burned through your two big marquee matches and now what's left? How do you top that? You're only going to set yourselves up for disappointment and considering how you've fumbled big finishes in the past, that is the absolute LAST thing anyone would want out of AEW.

Jim Ross interviews Dr. Britt about her upcoming title shot and a photo shoot brawl. And then Thunder Rosa defeated some job girl in a couple minutes. Then that Jade person appears to remind us that she is that bitch. Which bitch? Your guess is as good as mine. Also, I'm still looking for that supposed charisma that everyone claims she has.

And in the main event, Miro defeated TNT Champion Darby Allin to win the title. Good strong showing from both guys, with Darby continuing to impress and Miro finally becoming the monster brawler he should've been since Day 1 of stepping foot in AEW. Good main event despite the constant runs with Ethan Page and Scoprio Sky going after the elder statesicon STING that prompts a run-in from the Dark Order... and then Lance Archer stares down new champ Miro before the show ends.

Definitely a packed show of stuff on this here edition of Dynamite. A couple pretty good matches and a shit ton of stuff happening all at once is the name of the game and I was kinda... eh. Hopefully, they can go back to the groove that brought them to the dance in the first place instead of resorting to TNA-style booking and such.

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