Friday, February 28, 2020

That Bandwagon Is Heavy

It's another controversy at Saudi Arabia... what happened this time? Another international incident? More propaganda gone wrong? Too much female skin was exposed?

No, the controversy is that 527-year-old Bill Goldberg made his return to WWE and beat Bray Wyatt for the WWE Blue Belt... apparently, people are upset by this, so much so that they've threatened to cancel their WWE Network subscriptions.

Cool story, bro.

This is WWE's Seniors Tour, where Undertaker shows up at a gauntlet match as the last entrant and wins the match without ever taking off his hat and coat. This is where Miz and John Morrison are once again tag-team champions. This is where the old guys will have the most spotlight because they're the bigger stars and everyone else on the roster are a bunch of geeks who look like idiots in comparison.

I read the results for the show and I'm laughing my ass off at all the fake outrage. People upset by Brock Lesnar squashing Ricochet or Undertaker winning a thing at the last minute or Goldberg beating the Fiend? Why? I find out all these things and I shrug; none of these things surprise me. Ricochet is a geek that was disposed of as such, Undertaker/AJ might be a match at Mania and this could be the first step towards that, and Goldberg winning the title gives us Take 376,275,371,879 of the Roman Reigns coronation as the "main guy" at Wrestlemania because THIS TIME FOR SURE!

I'm not upset by this turn of events, I'm not going to cancel the Network as a result of this turn of events, and I'm certainly not going to join the latest trending bandwagon on Twitter to post some fake outrage just so I can get a bunch of likes. This is why I don't take Twitter seriously, because more often than not, the outrage is genuine; it's just a bunch of dipshits parroting the popular opinion for them likes and then they move on to the next fake controversy while all the genuine issues get overlooked because I'm twitting on the twitter like a fucking twit.

Bray Wyatt will be fine, kids. Sure, he lost the belt to an old guy. So what? Sooner or later, you'll forget this happen and he'll be back to his usual red light district self in no time. He doesn't need the title for that sort of thing.

They want to build up Wrestlemania as a big deal and so they bring back all the old stars who were big stars because nobody gives a shit about their current ones. It's a harsh reality that a WWE fan who has been watching this company for years on end needs to come to terms with because it's going to be a thing for a good long while. The current main event scene that populates your weekly programming are talented individuals who are saddled with horrendous material that presents them more as geeks than big time stars. It's been like this for years and it will continue to be like this. And on the one chance they fluke on a good idea, it's only a matter of time before they ruin that too.

It's largely why I kept away from modern WWE programming; it's too easy to be cynical about their storytelling and presentation. It's quite telling that we're about to roll into March and I've yet to watch the Royal Rumble in its entirety. Hell, it's perhaps even more telling that I'm not really all that excited for Wrestlemania. If anything, I'm more hyped for the next AEW PPV - whose top programs comprise largely former WWE guys - than I am this year's Wrestlemania; a scenario that I didn't think was fathomable.

In any event, that's over and done with. I'm sure WWE will find a way to give this latest Mania card something worth looking forward to... but I gotta be honest. I don't like their chances.

Maybe what this show needs is more Shane McMahon...

Never mind.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Keep it real and keep it clean.