COMIC REVIEW - Ultimatum (2009 Mini-Series)

Written by Jeph Loeb

Art by David Finch & Danny Miki

Stop me if you've heard this before, but Ultimatum is one of the worst comics I've read in the history of comics.

A paradigm shifting five-issue mini-series that serves as a transition between the old era of Ultimate Marvel and the new era that saw new series debut, Ultimatum can be best summed up as destruction porn for the sake of destruction porn topped with a shitload of primary, secondary, tertiary, and ancillary characters getting killed, maimed, crippled, or any combination of the above. It's low-brow schlock that tries to pass itself off as cutting edge and compelling storytelling, but fails miserably. The whole thing comes across as depressing, creatively bankrupt, and puts even the most gruesome "gore porn" to shame.

The only highlight is the art, which is always top notch and far too good for the shitpile that is Ultimatum. Of course, when it comes to the ladies, their... physical attributes gain some notable attention to detail at the expense of everything else. Sadly, that seems to be on par with the rest of this schlock. David Finch deserved better than to be associated with this crap.

I'm embarrassed to have read this crap. Embarrassed because Jeph Loeb usually churns out quality work and part of me assumes that this whole deal was the result of someone at Marvel daring Loeb to produce the absolute worst comic book to exist. Well, brother, you accomplished that in spades. I'm hard-pressed to tell if this is better or worse than Frank Miller's new Batman book.

Actually, that's easy. I'd go back and re-read Miller's book than this shit. At least, there's a perverse humor to such drivel. Here, not so much.

Fuck this comic book and fuck this company.