Classic Bite Commentary: December 23rd, 2007

(2018 Update: An old commentary replaces an old post.)





LATENESS NOTE: The majority of this commentary was written two days before Christmas and is left untouched. To make up for the fact that this commentary is late, I've added a P.S. listing my short display of Christmas gifts that isn't money.

WARNING: Contains language and some material unsuitable for younger readers. Discretion is advised.

Hey, kids. I've been really silent this past month and well... let's just say things have been keeping me busy... such as work, holiday shopping, webwork, and some recent gaming periods that have taken a good chunk of time. But for those who believe the lack of a Bite commentary in their month will cause the end of the world - and I'd like to believe that number is miniscule at best - don't fret. Here's a fresh new one, thus averting Armageddon. If only we could avert the PPV too...

Speaking of the PPV, I've heard it was of average quality. I did check out the results and was amazed that Edge won the title. Even moreso, he did so using a couple "fake" Edges in a coup that people would just shit on if some other promotion pulled this off. Meanwhile, I didn't expect Hardy to triumph over he of the three Hs, but I guess they have to live up to that "Anything can happen" hyperbole they keep pushing every day. Other than that, nothing to say since I've not seen the show. I'm holding out for the Rumble next month.

After months of "secret code" this and "save us all" that, Chris Jericho returned and did absolutely nothing to make things exciting on RAW. He did, however, bring JBL back into action. Boo-hoo. On the bright side, it looks like they're pushing for a Hardy/Orton main event at the Royal Rumble and even though I'll probably pick up the PPV anyway, it is a good chance to see something different in the main event picture for once, even if it is for a short while.

Saw the BSG: Razor telefilm recently and thought it was fairly decent. It didn't feel too boring and it didn't feel like a waste of time. The acting was good, the action sequences were fairly nice, and the nod to the old series with the old-style Cylongs and ships were a nice touch. Admittingly, there wasn't much on this show that would have kept me onboard (the shaky-cam effects sort of kills it for me) but this felt like a nice two-hour diversion that's worth a look if you're a fan of the current BSG series.

I've also bore witness to the finale of Operation Overdrive (mostly the final episode and not the episode that came before it) and I gotta say; this didn't feel anything like a finale despite people going their separate ways. Most of the previous PR finales post-MMPR have some semblance of closure and finality to it; even SPD, for all the shit that I give it, had a fairly decent finale. But this... this didn't give me a sense of closure, but rather feels like one of those mid-season episodes before a long block of repeats that would last until the next set of new episodes air. It just fell flat... just like the rest of this god-forsaken series.

Worst part is that Bruce Kalish, the exec responsible for this garbage, is slated to present to us the next incarnation entitled Jungle Fury. I'd like to give this the benefit of an open-mind, but Kalish already has two brainfucks out of three. As much as I hate to admit it, I've grown fond of Mystic Force and some of its episodes are actually tolerable - it has that Ninja Storm feel to it, but with amateur wizards instead of amateur ninjas. Can't really say the same for the other two.

So it's safe to say the word is out: Capcom has finally announced that they know how to count and are currently putting together Street Fighter IV. Since we're a little too late to have some dreamy commentary for what the game should be like, I'll just discuss what little nuggets of information has been leaked out. To my understanding, the game will be traditional 2D gameplay with 3D aesthetics. There will be a number of classic characters and will feel closer to SF2 than its various prequels and sequels. While a part of me is looking forward to this new incarnation - the first new Street Fighter in an eternity - another part of me is fearful of the fact that this is going to end up being Street Fighter II in 3D, because the world needs another fucking update to Street Fighter II since the other five-hundred versions weren't enough. I suppose they wanted to play it safe with this entry, since the last time they attempted innovative things with a SF game, people weren't truly receptive to it. People can be fucking morons at times, can't they? Nonetheless, here's hoping that SF4 doesn't suck.

For the past couple of weeks, Montreal was hit with a couple of snowstorms and we've amassed a total of about 80 centimeters worth thus far. Last year, we didn't even have one millimeter's worth of snow until early-January. I'd like to find the people who wished for a White Christmas and shoot them with my Zapper, since I have no other use for it these days.

Okay, that's all for today. I'll be posting the usual 2007: Year In Review report on the blog, which is notably smaller than previously but not as bad. So until then, happy and safe holidays.

Later,
Dave

BONUS FEATURE: CHRISTMAS GIFTS

Keepin' it short and sweet: I've got three sweaters, a pair of pants, a bottle of Crown Royal whiskey, and some wrestling books... the ECW book, the Ric Flair book, the Jerry Lawler book, and the Stone Cold book. Oh yeah, and I got some money. All in all, good stuff.