Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Classic Bite Commentary: February 27th, 2007

(2018 Update: Replaced an older post with an even older Bite commentary.)

Earlier this week, former ECW heavyweight champion Mike Awesome recently passed away at the age of 42. While I don't really want to touch on the means of death, but instead I just want to remember him for all the great matches he had over the course of his career.

I remember when I saw him win the ECW title on PPV back in 99; it was the first ECW PPV aired in Canada at the time. While I was never a big fan of the guy, Awesome had a presence that made him different from other big guys in WW(F) or WCW. Here was a guy who not only looked like he could kick your ass, but wouldn't have a problem doing it effortlessly either. He wasn't a gimmick, he was this big bad brawler.

Then he went to WCW and man, what a big deal that was among the ECW fanbase; their current World Champion was jumping over to hated territory. WCW could have made a big deal with Awesome considering the circumstances. But instead, they gave him all these shitty gimmicks such as the 70s guy or Fat Chick Thriller or whatever... and then he was in WWE  and let's forget all that.

His last big match around these parts was at the ECW One Night Stand show (the first one - and quite frankly, the only good one) where he had that last match with Masato Tanaka. Brutal stuff, man. But excellent too.

My condolences go out to his family and friends, as well as all those who knew him.

With that said, I want to welcome you to the Bite. I've got quite a bit to say (some bits taken and expanded from the Blog) so let's jump start this thing.

After much hesitation and consternation due to the reading of many reviews and other elements too embarrassing to mention, I relented and picked up Big Apple Takedown about a week ago. For those who don't know about the book, it's the recent WWE novel that features select WWE superstars being drafted and trained by the government to form a black-ops group, charged with the mission of taking down a drug ring in New York... all before the big show in Madison Square Garden. I swear to God, if it were possible to make this up...

Make no mistake about it. The plot is downright stupid, the cover (featuring a leather-clad Torrie Wilson with a gun and a silly smile) is embarrassing, and some of the dialogue and situations are so unbelievable that it's simply awesome... What? You expected me to say it's a bad book? Okay, fine. This is a bad book, but it's because of its badness that it's garnered somewhat of a favorable reputation (from what I've read anyway). The minute you hear "WWE wrestlers as spies" as a focal point in the story, you know suspension of disbelief is not only necessary, but it's mandatory. This isn't high art; it's pure camp. If you treat it as such, you'll get a kick out of it.

Sad thing is that the day after I had made that lofty purchase (along with another book called Savage Messiah and Our Dumb Century), I've had early symptoms of a flu. At first, it wasn't so bad (minor cold, some sneezing) and didn't think much of it. The next day, that flu attack had had upgraded to lots of coughing, a slight fever, and a running nose (not that kind of running, dumbass). Despite extended hours of sleep, the flu apparently got worse as my slight fever became much worse and I had lost all energy to move. It was an effort to just to make it to the bathroom which is only a few feet across and it usually doesn't take much to go there from the minute I wake up. As a result, I had to skip work yesterday... which meant another number of hours staring at a fucking ceiling.

Of course, after a while, the bedroom got too hot and it was thought it wouldn't be a good idea to have me lay there. So I put on some warm clothes and made my way to my den (where all the computer stuff is) and just aimlessly browse the Internet. As time passed and many forms of medication were taken, the fever died down with only a sore throat and snotting nose remaining. Not much, but better compared to how I was feeling that morning.

So I went back to work. Business as usual. Some coughing persists, but bit by bit, it's slowly going away.

Wrestlecrap visitors and site forum users have voted the Exploitation of Eddie Guerrero as the Gooker Award of 2006. Though chances are the article is down, it does sum up all the tasteless and mean-spirited storylines that WWE have undertaken to drag a good man's name down the mud. Unfortunately, in later years, people won't remember Eddie Guerrero as a great wrestler or even as a modern-day miracle, but as a name in some of the worst written storylines ever produced on a wrestling show. I really don't want to add any more to this topic than absolutely necessary, but if you want to know more about Eddie's life and legacy before it became a cheap sports-entertainment gimmick, you can check out my tribute here.

In case anyone cared to ask, I voted for the return of ECW as the Gooker choice. Not because it was the more offensive, but anything to not add fuel to this ongoing stupidity that is the tarnishing of Eddie's good name.

On a positive note to WWE proceedings, if you haven't gotten a chance to check out their "Around The Ring" podcasts featuring Cole & Bradshaw, go for it. It's a pretty decent showing and I hope they make more of these. It's actually one of the few good things on the WWE site right now, which means it'll eventually get canned and replaced with some fluff Diva piece nobody cares about.

Don't know if it's mentioned here or somewhere else, but I've recently checked out the trailer for WWE Film's next "opus" picture, The Condemned... the one with Steve Austin in it. From a look at the trailer, it looks good, has a nice gritty tone to it, and the backstory actually seems remotely interesting, like a low-grade Battle Royale type. Now if they can minimize (or eliminate altogether) the use of worthless hip-hop from their soundtrack and can pull together a good script, this could very well be the more successful of the three flicks released.

That's it for now. See you in a couple weeks.

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