Monday, July 20, 2015

2447 - WWE Battleground 2015



The final PPV event before Summerslam is... well, let's see;
Randy Orton defeated Sheamus in the opening contest. Well, this was a thing that happened, but it was relatively inoffensive at best. Some might throw a fit at Sheamus losing (since he has a briefcase and all that), but I'm not at all disappointed here.

So they replay the one bit from last Monday's RAW where the Bellas are taunting Paige again and then Stephanie McMahon shows up to bring in the three women from NXT and everybody is praising this as a reinvigoration of the Divas division... And I would have agreed... if it Stephanie wasn't involved. Here was an opportunity to bring in three talented women from NXT in a big way, bring them up to the main roster in a way that complimented their awesome talents... and yet the way the whole thing was done, it ended up being all about Stephanie and her genius. This is further evident with a live interview with Stephanie, who is towering over the little interviewing lady.

For fuck's sake, people, I was actually looking forward to the Divas Division getting a shot in the arm with some fresh faces who could actually make the damn thing interesting and you ruin it by making Stephanie The Shrieking Shrill the focal point of this so-called revolution? Are you fucking shitting me? How much better would it have been if you had that same segment, but without that goddamned harpy sucking all the energy away? #StephanieRuinsEverything needs to be a thing.

WWE Tag Team Champions Prime Time Players (Titus O'Neil, Darren Young) defeated New Day (Kofi, Big E, Xavier Woods) to retain the titles. Meh... this was a thing that happened and would no doubt be the designated piss break for racists or something. It was alright, but it was just there.

Bray Wyatt defeated Roman Reigns thanks to timely interference from Luke Harper, who's apparently back with Bray again... no issues with this. Surprised that they're not making Roman strong here, but in any case, I've no complaints. This was pretty good for what it's worth.

Charlotte (with Paige, Becky Lynch) defeated Brie Bella (with Nikki Cena and Melina vs. Alicia Fox) and Sasha Banks (with two Divas who don't matter) when Charlotte made Brie tap to her Figure Eight finisher. The smartest thing they did here was minimize the Bella deal so that the two women who know what they're doing could do the real work. If nothing else, it's a showcase of two talented women to the main audience and a positive sign that, yes, they're actually making me interested in the women's division of WWE.

Now if only they kick Stephanie to the curb as far as this so-called "revolution" goes... but I digress.

US Champ John Cena defeated Kevin Owens to retain the title... meh. There goes any chance of giving Cena something interesting to do. And to the surprise of absolutely nobody, this third match between the two was nowhere near as good as their first two encounters. I'm sure Owens will be fine because he's still the best villain they've got at the moment, but this should have been his moment to shine. Once again, WWE excels in taking the easiest thing to book and completely fucking it up from the gate.

There was supposed to be an IC title match between Ryback and Miz and Big Show (I guess), but Ryback recently got a staph infection and needed a half-dozen Z-Packs, so he couldn't make it. So instead, we got Big Show punching out Miz. It was kept short, at least.

The insomnia-curing "match" between Brock Lesnar and WWE Champion Seth Rollins came to a merciful end when Undertaker showed up and beat up the Beast for a bit. Apparently, 'Taker is a bit miffed that he only now remembered that he needed to get his win back. Well, thank fuck for that, right? Maybe Brock will be able to do more than just constant suplexes. Seriously, am I the only one who doesn't get the appeal of this guy? I mean, for fuck's sake, he's doing the same shtick that got Scott Steiner crapped on back in 2003 when he stunk up the joint with Triple H. Seriously!

A rare Undertaker appearance along with a halfway decent Divas match and some good stuff from the usual suspects make Battleground 2015 an adequate showing if nothing else. There were moments where I just blanked out at times watching this, but all in all, not too bad. Not a must-watch, but certainly not bad.

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